My friend Diana came over today for a visit. The plan had been to go for a walk, but I had a few errands to run, so she tagged along.
I do feel that the test of true friendship is:
A: Will help you move, even though you sport a hefty collection of vintage dishware.
B: Will listen to you rant, even though you both know you’re in the wrong.
C: A willingness to accompany you on boring errands.
We stopped in to the main Goodwill thrift store, as we were just a stone’s throw away. I picked up a few holiday gifts, (which will have to remain secret as certain family members have been known to read my blog).
I go to thrift shops frequently, so I am fairly immune to the wealth of available merchandise. Such was not the case for Diana.
Diana kept picking up, well . . . crap. A questionably ancient air popper marked at $5, and a so-so basket peaked her interest.
I knew the time had come to explain:
Dutch tulip fever.
Dutch tulip fever is the tendency to buy a certain theme of useless crap that seems exciting at the time of purchase, but is instantly regrettable once taken home. (This term is used frequently in my family, and has prevented many a crappy purchase.)
Like going to Holland and buying a bunch of tulip theme gifts for all your loved ones.
And Diana was burning up with fever.
She did eventually put back the basket, and left the popper there as well. She ended up buying a like-new Monopoly set and a large new stuffed animal for her son.
And I no longer fear for her health.
Have you ever been overcome with Dutch tulip fever? Aran sweaters in Ireland? Chili pepper lights in New Mexico? Dolls in Japan? Crap in a thrift store? Tell us about it in the comments section below.
“Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without.”