A Word on Heirloom Guilt

by Katy on October 26, 2011 · 19 comments

 

My grandmother's pot inspired my home's orange touches

The following is a reprint of an article by Béa Johnson from The Zero Waste Home. Thank you very much for sharing!

Katy Wolk-Stanley

“Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without”

 

 

“For you, [Bea] you are on a different level, ‘Zero waste’ means you have to eliminate even mementos and pictures. To each their own, but it’s not a road I am willing to go down.” – Sam.

 

Come on now, let’s not exaggerate, I have reduced mementos, but have not eliminated them, and especially not pictures! I cherish them so much that I have even scanned most of them to keep them safe from deterioration and loss.
What I did eliminate from my life though, is heirloom guilt, that is the guilt associated with letting go of heirlooms by fear of:
  • Forgetting our ancestors,
  • Disappointing our ancestors,
  • Not conforming to the tradition of passing down,
  • Erasing a family story,
  • Lowering one’s financial worth (“I can’t sell it for what it is worth”).
I believe that we do not need things to remember our lost ones. But everyone is free to do what feels right. I feel right having chosen not to hold onto anything that belonged to my grandpa, even though I loved him dearly. I get reminded of him everyday when I get lost into the blue of Max’s eyes, when I see Leo’s “derriere” that sticks out (a family trait), and when I wear my boots with metal heel plates (he wore them too and I can hear my grandpa walking in my shoes).
As with everything else, I applied the 5R’s to guide the way I deal with heirlooms:

 

Refuse: Say no while you can. Being proactive is a big part of our lifestyle. Thinking of outcomes and addressing them before the time comes (in this case a family death) is key: My living parents already know that I am not interested in inheriting their stuff. I have just what I need and I like what I have. End of story. A hundred years ago, it might have made sense to pass down a good set of china to support a struggling young couple. But with today’s consumerism, that same set of China no longer supports, it clutters.

Reduce: Stick to one box per family member. Letting go of the pieces you can part with, helps keep the amount under manageable control. Sell the coin collection and take a trip with the proceeds. Wouldn’t your mother agree? In the hospice, dying people do not mention regretting leaving their coin collection behind, they regret not going after their dreams (Bonnie Ware, who worked for years nursing the dying, wrote about a great article on “5 Regrets of the Dying“). Maybe their unfulfilled dream can fund or kick start yours!

Reuse: Use Your Heirlooms. I do not need to store my grandmother’s pot, I can actually use it (it even inspired my home’s orange touches!). I think my grandmother would be happy to know that I have not let the pot clutter my life (stored for safekeeping somewhere, using up expensive real estate), she would be thrilled to know that I am actually using it. After-all, it is not the stuff that she left behind, but the memories and the stories that we share, that matter.

 

“The last thing I want is for someone else to have to throw away my junk! I’d rather leave only memories and skills behind” – Anonymous.
Recycle: Turn worn-out items into something else; make bulk bags out of an old sheet for example or plant flowers in your grandfather’s boots. All my kitchen towels are made from an old linen sheet from my grandmother. I am using her thrifty ways (a skill that I did happily inherit from her) to use every inch of it.

 

Rot: If I run into another lock of hair, it’s definitely going into the compost!
I can affirm that for me, the biggest advantage of living a lifestyle of voluntary simplicity has been a great improvement in quality of life, but also freeing myself from heirloom guilt. I believe that when parents pass something down, they do not mean to burden us or instill guilt, they just want to make a gesture that they think is mandatory. But once it’s yours, it’s your choice to do whatever you want with it. It’s a free country, right?!

 

Do you feel burdened by heirloom guilt? Please share your thoughts in the comments section below.

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Glamour, Non-Consumer Style

by Katy on October 25, 2011 · 18 comments

It’s ever so dreary to live a glamorous lifestyle.

I know I’ve said it in the past, but I’m going to say it again —  I love my neighborhood. It’s central, it’s walkable and it’s actually comprised of useful businesses. Businesses that help support my glamorous, movie star-like lifestyle.

Just yesterday I set out to run a few errands on foot. First I dropped off my plastics recycling, (like Gwyneth Paltrow) then I walked over to get my hair cut. (Like Bridget Bardot.)  Luckily, my favorite stylist was available, so I sat down and got yet another fantastic $11 haircut. (I then tipped $9, as I’m pretty sure that my sons usually forget to add a tip when they go for their haircuts.)

Feeling rather attractive, I sashayed my way down the boulevard and stopped into the optical shop. This stop was necessary, as the screw had come out of my rather fabulous $1.99 Goodwill sunglasses, rendering them pretty much useless. The clerk was happy to hunt down the prefect size screw, and of course she refused any money for the job. (Us movie stars often get free services as a thank you for our contributions to the world.)

My next stop was Ben and Jerry’s, where I spent a $24 Groupon on five pints of ice cream plus a nice big chocolatey brownie. (We’ll be hosting two 14-year-old Japanese exchange students later in the week, so I thought it would nice to stock the freezer with treats.) I then took the brownie over to the optical shop as a thank you for fixing my Goodwill sunglasses. Needless to say, it was received with rapturous appreciation. Now keep in mind, I always have Groupon credit to spend, so all these goodies were free!

A quick stop into Fred Meyer for lettuce, (bringing my own eco-friendly produce bag —  just like Alicia Silverstone!) and my errands were complete.

Glamorously, and please no autographs. I’m just trying to live a normal life.

Katy Wolk-Stanley

“Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without”

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Autumnal Non-Consumer Photo Essay

by Katy on October 24, 2011 · 13 comments

Autumn in Portland, Oregon is usually a rather wet experience. But this year has been a bit drier than usual, which translates to crisp instead of soggy leaves. It’s lovely, pure and simple.

Wonderfully dry maple leaves blanket my backyard.

 

Dry weather means I can still employ my backyard clothesline.

 

Of course, indoor laundry is guaranteed to stay out of the rain.

 

Katy Wolk-Stanley

“Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without”

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Five Things That Make Me Happy and One Thing That’s Pissing Me Off

by Katy on October 22, 2011 · 32 comments

  1. I woke today to find that I won a cookbook and gift card to Grand Central Bakery. All I did was post a comment about healthy eating on their Facebook page, which was “My healthy eating habit is to just keep the crap out of the house. This is also known as the why-I-don’t-buy-Nutella theory.” I will of course regift the cookbook and use the gift card. But that’s just how I roll.
  2. Yesterday was my mother’s 69th birthday, so we had her and my step-father over for dinner. I made Julia Child’s Boeuf Bourguignon, cheddar biscuits and a big ol’ chocolate cake. Everything was beyond delicious and helped to keep my house smelling like heaven throughout the day. Because I buy gifts at thrift stores all year long, I think I spent a total of $5 on gifts. Hooray for a mother who is happy to receive vintage salt and pepper shakers, a signed Short Attention Span Theater postcard from John Stewart, a (free) Walgreens collage print and a handpainted Mrs. Butterworth’s figure, complete with straw hat. Yeah, I give the best gifts.
  3. When I went to lunch with my father the other day, our conversation was so interesting and moving that I saw the woman at the table next to us start to tear up. Yup, we’re profound.
  4. I completed filming my reality TV segment for a national network last week. Although the process took two 14 hour days, my segment will only be around seven minutes. This does not bother me, as I actually want them to edit out the garbled and uninteresting bits. It should air around the beginning of the year, and I’ll do a big announcement when it’s no longer “confidential.” I am hoping to milk this for a free trip to New York. (Today Show, are you listening?) Why New York? Because my sister lives there and I love visiting New York!
  5. Today is Saturday, which means that both my sons have soccer games. However, neither of the games overlap and it’s actually not raining! The no-rain thing is a rarity in Oregon.
  6. Despite multiple sprays with enzymatic cleaner and deep cleaning with my new Bissell steam cleaner, my fantastic $15 Goodwill armchair still smells like cat pee. The problem is that the urine went into the crack where the seat and back come together, and it’s next to impossible to reach. I love this chair and will continue to work on this problem. Meanwhile, I have upholstered furniture on my front porch, which is such an awesome and sophisticated look.

Now you — What’s making you happy and pissed off today?

Katy Wolk-Stanley

“Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without”

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Book Porn

by Katy on October 21, 2011 · 34 comments

I ♥ books. I love library books, I love bookstore books, I love audiobooks and I love borrowed books. I do not have an e-reader, as I am too cheap to ever consider buying one, plus taking an almost endlessly reusable paper item (a single book can be read by almost countless people) and replacing it with a piece of only-for-one-person  and soon-to-be-outdated electronics just rubs me the wrong way.

I know, I know, you have a Kindle and love it. Blah, blah, blah . . .to each their own. (But seriously, I am right and you are wrong.)

Right now I am listening again to Tina Fey’s Bossypants. For the second time in a fortnight. Cause yeah, it’s that good. I am making myself an object of ridicule to my family, as I listen to the audiobook through my CD Walkman headphones while puttering about. So there is excessive and spontaneous snorty laughing that doubles me over with mirth. Which pretty much makes me look absolutely insane as no one but me can hear Ms. Fey’s words.

Seriously, if laughter is the best medicine, then this book is Penicillin + Morphine + Prozac.

And I should know. After all, I am an RN.

I also just finished reading The Help by Kathryn Stockett, which lived up to the hype. For those who may have taken up residence under a rock and know nothing of current best sellers, The Help is a novel about a small Mississippi town in 1963, focusing on the friction between the upper middle class white citizens and their African American domestics. The chapters switch back and forth between characters, and I found it more gripping of a page turner than The Da Vinci Code and Nancy Drew combined. Although it is the author’s first novel, it does not read like one. I won’t share too much, as I don’t want to reveal any of the plot lines.

I actually bought this book brand spanking new, as I was on my way to an evening of sitting in a waiting room that I knew would be torture without planned reading material. (However, I did make the purchase at a small locally owned bookstore.) I plan on lending this book out repeatedly, as it would be a shame to shelve it.

If you like To Kill a Mockingbird, then you will love this book.

I have also been enjoying Downtown Chic: Designing Your Dream Home: From Wreck to Ravishing by Robert and Cortney Novogratz. This hefty coffee table book shows how the Novogratz couple furnished and designed their multiple homes. Yes, they appear to be insanely wealthy, but they’re also insanely creative. I love how their aesthetic vision is more about designing for current occupants rather than keeping it tame in the name of future sale-ability.

As self-taught designers, the couple run a design firm in New York City and specialize in creating loud, bright and distinctly unique interiors. And they’re huge fans of vintage pieces, and are not shy about picking these up at lowly thrift shops. They also have an HGTV show, which is how I discovered them. And of course, my copy of this book is from the library.

Just writing this post is making me want to browse through the book again. I do love me some design porn!

Have any books to recommend to The Non-Consumer Advocate community? Please share your finds in the comments section below.

Katy Wolk-Stanley

“Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without”

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Time is Not Money

by Katy on October 20, 2011 · 24 comments

How many times have you heard the phrase “Time is Money” used to justify a consumption driven life? It’s the excuse given to criticize couponers, get out of maintaining one’s own home and to rationalize everything from instant meals to exercise avoidance.

But break down the Time is Money argument, and you will find that it is full of holes.

Everyone on this entire planet is given the same 24 hours per day. Martha Stewart gets this much time, and so does your lazy brother-in-law.

So should we make every minute count for something? Is there value in doing nothing? 

Yesterday I invited my mother over to hang out together, as I had been thinking about how the only time we seem to spend together is spent cleaning her rental houses. (Note how we “spend” time.) Not that I resent the work, but it’s hardly my favorite activity. We ended up watching The King’s Speech together, which we’d been talking about doing since it first came into theaters. And then I made her watch an episode of Cash and Cari and then . . . I took a nap. I didn’t clean up the breakfast dishes, I didn’t take advantage of the non-rain to hang laundry and I didn’t get ahead on my writing.

I watched a movie with my mother, and I took a nap. Period.

If time is money, then how the hell could I justify my day? I certainly made no money, and I was not able to present a fully crossed-off to-do list. But you know what? I did exactly what I wanted to do. There was nothing I should have done and didn’t.

And no, time is not money. Time is time. That’s it, nothing more.

Katy Wolk-Stanley

“Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without”

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Less Heat Challenge 2011-2012

by Katy on October 19, 2011 · 74 comments

I have run a No Heat Challenge over the past few years here at The Non-Consumer Advocate, but am going to amend it this year to a Less Heat Challenge. Because really, although I promoted the idea of waiting as long as possible before turning on the ol’ furnace each fall, the main idea was always to keep your house cooler than normal. Not to live without heat.

So far this year, I’ve had a couple of times when I’ve wanted to turn on the heat, but those moments have passed by without any furnace action. (I did notice that the house was a chilly 61º one morning last week.) All of our beds now have flannel sheets on them, and the TV room lap blankets are back in rotation.

In the winter we normally keep set our programmable thermostat at 63° during the day and 57º at night. However, last year we hosted a Japanese exchange teacher and ended up keeping the house warmer than normal. (I don’t remember the specific numbers.)

If you are able to turn your thermostat down 2,3 or even four degrees from normal, you will save a ton a ton of money, not to mention the green-friendly energy savings. So throw on an extra layer, and put your tootsies in some wool socks, cause baby, the Less Heat Challenge in on!

Will you be participating in this year’s challenge? Please write your name in the comments section below.

Katy Wolk-Stanley

“Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without”

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A Day to Chill Out

by Katy on October 18, 2011 · 11 comments

Today, I am going to putter around my house, read my book and enjoy the sunny crisp weather. I’m not going to write a blog piece.

See you tomorrow.

Katy Wolk-Stanley

“Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without”

 

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Link-O-Rama-Mama — Picker Revolutionaries, Crooked Carrots and Eco vs. Budget

by Katy on October 17, 2011 · 10 comments

Van from Thrift Core.

It’s time again for Link-O-Rama-Mama, where I lazily link to other people’s well written and thoroughly written articles.

Garbage Picking, It’s Not Just for Weirdos Anymore

Of the blogs I follow, Thrift Core is one of my favorites. Written by the artistically gifted Van, Thrift Core chronicles her thrifting adventures and current efforts to open a brick and mortar shop in Florida. She’s a clever duck, and it’s always fun to watch how she’s able to spin straw into gold.

Today’s Thrift Core post is about how curbside garbage picking is nothing to be ashamed about, and ends with the quote:

“You’re a revolutionary. You choose not to pay high prices for inferior products when you can get the real deal for free. Viva La Picker Revolucion, comrade! Remember, if they don’t want it, that’s more picking for us. And there’s more than enough to go around…”

Viva la Picker Revolucion?! Umm . . . count me in. ¡Por favor!

Click HERE to read today’s Thrift Core post.

 

Enough Food, But it’s Going to Waste

Jonathan Bloom of Wasted Food clued me into a great op-ed piece in The NY Times titled, “The Crooked Carrot is Also Food” which featured the information that:

“The fact is that the world could feed itself, both now and in 2050. The problem is not that the world grows too little food; there is plenty of food overall. The problem is that while there is too much food in some places and not enough in others, everywhere food is wasted. Each year, 1.3 billion tons of food is lost worldwide.”

The idea that so many live with food insecurity while viable food gets wasted is abhorrent to me. I know that my own almost-wastage of CSA tomatillos, (thank you Sara for taking them back!) doesn’t directly result in starvation across the globe. But I do know that when I stay within my own grocery budget, I’ll never have to question the feasibility of sending $29 per month to young Zambian Frida Sakala through Childfund International. (We have been sponsoring her for at least five years.)

Click HERE to read the article.

 

A Tight Budget Doesn’t Have to Exclude Eco-Choices

The issue of people having to give up pricey eco-friendly options has hit The NY Times in an article titled, “Eco Meets The Economy.” The story features interviews with consumers who have made the switch from expensive purchases to lesser price options without giving up their sustainable goals.

“Not long ago, Mr. Alter found himself in a grocery store, trying to decide between $10-a-pound organic bacon and a nonorganic brand that cost $5. In the end, he didn’t buy either one. ‘More and more people are doing that,’ he said. ‘It’s like ‘Buy Nothing Day’ all year.’ “

From people replacing Seventh Generation brand cleaners with vinegar/water solutions to people making do with stuff they already have, this is a great article for the Times to put out there.

Click HERE to read the article in its entirety.

Katy Wolk-Stanley

“Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without”

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What’s Your Style of Meal Planning?

by Katy on October 16, 2011 · 49 comments

El Pato

The following is a reprint of a previously published post. Enjoy!

When I read about frugality, one tip that I see repeated over and over is weekly menu planning. And yes, I see the appeal of knowing that Sunday is pot roast, Monday is spaghetti, and Tuesday is pizza. But I don’t buy it. I consider myself to be the Queen Empress of frugal cooking, yet weekly menu planning ends up being more expensive for me because I find myself planning complicated meals instead of working with what I already have on hand. And incorporating leftovers that are needing to get used up becomes more difficult if the menu is unyielding.

What gives?

I rarely shop for individual meals, but to stock the pantry and refrigerator. By utilizing this method, I’m able to prepare almost endless varieties of meals based on how much time I have and what we’re in the mood for. (I don’t work full time, and I’m aware that this affords me the luxury to be a bit more casual about meal preparation.)

Foods that I try and always keep on hand:

  • Dried beans, such as pinto, black beans and lentils.
  • Onions, potatoes and garlic.
  • Eggs, milk, butter and sour cream.
  • Cereals such as raisin bran and Cheerios.
  • Shredded mozzarella, bleu cheese and blocks of nice local cheddar cheese.
  • Tortilla mix, bread, dried pastas.
  • Individually frozen chicken breasts, (even though I complain mightily about my husband buying them.)
  • Frozen corn and peas.
  • Canned tomatoes, peanut butter, pumpkin puree, condensed milk, and El Pato tomato sauce in the yellow can. (Which is the best hot sauce and comes in a lovely small tin, perfect for avoidance of food waste.)
  • Fours, sugar, cornmeal, baking soda and powder.
  • A single box of S&W brand Japanese curry.
  • Brown and white rice.
  • Romaine lettuce that I have washed and chopped, and is stored in the salad spinner.
  • Homemade salad dressing.
  • Chocolate chips. (This above all else is vitally important!)
  • I also buy fruits and vegetables based on what’s in season and on sale.

I really do feel that I save money employing this dinner prep flexibility, but I still hear from readers who say they save money and avoid food waste by planning out their meals.

Are you a meticulous planner or a what-do-I-have-the-ingredients-for style of chef? Maybe a little of both? Please share your meal planning ideas in thecomments section below.

Katy Wolk-Stanley

“Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without.”

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