My big sister Jessie just finished a five days visit to jolly ol’ Portland, Oregon. We had a great time, and somehow carved out huge chunks of kid-free leisure time. (Thank you, UK Socca Camp!)
We went skirt shopping at Goodwill (no actual skirts found, nor purchased), met up with friends for lunch/breakfast/coffee, hung out with family, and generally had the kind of fun times that moms with tiny progeny can only fantasize about. (George Clooney normally only enters our rich fantasy lives if he’s available to babysit.)
But last night was the apex.
We treated ourselves to cute blonde streaks with a shared Clairol Nice ‘N Easy highlights kit.
Together we sat, cramped in my one tiny bathroom, pulling strands of ouchy hair through the super-sexy hair-streaking cap. We jabbed at each another’s scalps with the pokey crochet hook, in a love you/must take opportunity to torture you method unique to sisterdom throughout the world.
It turns out that Jessie is not actually very good at pulling hair strands all the way through the cap. Or maybe . . . she’s very good at it and simply hates my guts. Either way, my hair looked like crap, with weird irregular dishwater blond lowlights.
Alrighty-then, her turn now.
Jessie cuts slits into the cap, so her highlights will be chunkier. I decide to cut a few extra so the highlights will be close to symmetrical.
A snip here, a snip there.
Oops . . . .
A big clump of what looks suspiciously like hair floats gently to the ground.
“Um Jessie, I think I just cut a big hunk of your hair off.”
Luckily, she’s just gotten a haircut with a lot of layers.
I finish up her highlights. I do a bang-up job in the process, if I may say so myself.
While she showers, I use up the leftover bleachy-stuff to fix my own hair. It helps. I hope.
I have an epiphany. . .
“Hey Jessie, you know how I’m always saying, ‘Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without.’ ?”
(It’s hard to get the words out, because I’m now laughing really hard.)
“Yeah?”
“Your hair is now the ‘Do without.’!”
So here it is:
Use it up: We used up every last drop of the hair bleach to successfully fix my “loving” sister’s hostile hair maneuvers.
Wear it out: We will enjoy our cute new do’s way past when normal women have gone to the salon for a root touch-up.
Make it do: I was able to fix those horrible lowlights with the leftover bleach.
Or do without: Jessie now has to “do without” a big hunk of hair on her left side.
Sorry, Jessie.
Katy Wolk-Stanley
“Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without.”
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You do not write a blog post like this without photos. You just DON’T.
This was hilarious! I’ve been on the fence about home dyes and I think I’ll just “do without.” 🙂
Holy smokes Katy,
Can’t wait to see your hair 🙂 I have been taking on the delayed waste in my fridge. I was pleasantly surprised to find that the bunch of basil that I bought at the Saturday market….. a week ago, was not a brown blob of slime. I also found that the fuji apples that were a bit shriveled, were a delightful addition to a batch of sangria made with some strawberry freezer jam, that didn’t “set up”, that was given to me and a bottle of wine of the month….. that was icky. I cancelled my wine of the month club today as well as my echoes online subscription. I used to like to listen to it at work until the “no streaming media” rule was enacted. Just saved around $540 a year. 🙂
Have a wonderful time in Seattle.
Oh man, this one made me laugh. I can totally picture the two of you!
So, so funny!! That took me back to college when three of us decided to try the cap and crochet highlighting kit. One friend decided at the last minute that she really just wanted some all-over color, so she dispensed with the cap altogether. After the obligatory cap photo shoot, the other friend and I looked in on our capless comrade, only to find her crouched in the shower with her hands over her electric orange hair. Still brings tears to my eyes! 🙂