I don’t how it happens, but family birthdays always seem to clump up together. (Okay, as a labor and delivery nurse I actually do know what, ahem . . . leads to birthdays. But that’s neither here nor there.) And my family is no exception. Our birthday-clumpage occurs in October, December, January and May.
This week brings birthdays for both my younger son, who’s turns 14 and my husband who inches along middle-agedom to the grand ol’ age of 47. Sadly, my husband’s celebrations have become obscured by our son’s birthday ever since 1998. It mysteriously only falls on weekdays, (I swear it’s true!) and lives under the shadow that is Kid Birthday.
I haven’t started planning yet, but I would like to do something special for my husband. The evening already involves a mandatory parent meeting at the high school, but that doesn’t mean the whole day is shot. So I ask you:
What are your special family birthday traditions, frugal or otherwise?
C’mon, I need some fresh ideas and inspiration!
Please share your ideas in the comments section below.
Katy Wolk-Stanley
“Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without”
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{ 51 comments… read them below or add one }
Well they sure do clump all together now, don’t they! May and June are real doozies for us!
We try to combine parties for the little ones when we can and for my small little immediate family, we do a homemade, home cooked meal of the birthday persons request versus going out to some fancy pants restaurant and dropping some serious $$ on something we could make better ourselves anyways – LOL
Take him somewhere nice for lunch? Or go for an afternoon beer?
I like free stuff as much as the next guy, so here’s a great site! http://www.heyitsfree.net/birthday-freebies/ Most of them require that you sign up for some “birthday club” via email, but I just use my junk-email address for that. Also, some are redeemable on your birthday itself (so that’s lunch and dinner!) and some are redeemable within your birthday month. None of it is particularly healthy, but that’s what birthdays are for!!!
Cool, thanks!
Katy
We’ve become increasingly bigger fans of activities as opposed to gifts. Dinner out, Go-Karts, the shooting range <— All recent Husband birthday activities in years past. And a handy dandy time for groupons. 😉
My husband is not a big birthday celebration fan, but what I do – and what he loves – is when I make him his favorite food that his mom made for their birthday celebrations when he was growing up … barbequed meatballs, scalloped corn and pudding pie. I’ve also surprised him by having very low key celebrations – just a couple friends meeting up for beers at our house. Nothing too crazy.
That’s not so much clumpage. Ours are January, April, May and June.
December/January includes:
Dec 11
Dec 16
Dec 23
Dec 26
Dec 31
January 4
That my dear, is some serious clumpage. 😉
Katy
Me and hubby really do not celebrate our birthdays, it is just another day other than the favorite meal cooked for dinner. We have 3 kids with birthdays all 2 weeks apart! Being a homeschooling mom, I typically will spend about $200 a birthday (starting months before the clump happens) and get them high interest /educational gifts with maybe one for pure pleasure. Such as chemistry sets or violins this year.
Now me and hubby do celebrate our anniversary but do not always have money to do so. Things we have done, dumpster diving , scrap metal hunting dates, metal dectecting, long hikes, massage each other, garage saling, going for a drive with the purpose of getting lost (with a cooler in trunk for picnic lunch) .
Or a lovely walk along some waterfront. Fishing together is also something else we do.
Ooh, that’s hard to say without actually knowing your husband. I could tell you what would bless mine, but that might not work for Mr. NCA.
What really blows his hair back? Spending time with you? A meal out? A gift certificate? An experience? Doing a project with him? Getting around to something he’s been wanting you to do?
Is there something you guys used to enjoy together when you were dating?
Hmm . . . good questions.
Katy
Oh, and we have some serious clumpage in February/March. In Mr. FG’s family and our own, there are 7 birthdays in about a six-week time period.
I like Kristen’s suggestions – my stepfather loves pie, so one year his ‘present’ was a variety of slices of pie from a local restaurant, so he could have a lot of different tastes, and not have to choose just one. I, on the other hand, would find it rather meh as a present.
Broader family traditions have included:
– special dinner/meal and cake (or pie, see above). Some of us really like the super-pretty kinds of cakes, so those with artistic skills can contribute in that way
– lengthy, sentimental cards. I come from a wordy family, and these are often a part of birthdays, Mothers’ /Fathers’ Day, etc.
– massages, and other ‘I’m focusing my time and attention on you’ kinds of things.
– giving the person ‘time off’ from what they normally have to do in terms of chores, household responsibilities, etc.
no clumps here. . .we’re so far apart we just live it up like Ja Rule.
I still haven’t gotten the no-spend instituted so we tend to buy things that are needed.
My birthdays are all about seeing my friends, so usually I just plan a potluck!
My family loves clumps — to the day! Most of us were born on the same day as someone else — I grew up sharing my day with 3 others, and a few years ago we were up to 5 of us, followed by my sister & GGma the next day. My brother also shares with 2 cousins. Oy!
We always cook dinner at home but the birthday person gets to choose the dinner. Breakfast in bed is another BD favorite tradition.
We bake cakes for each other. If you check out the comments, you can see what the rest of the Grumpy Nation does. 🙂
http://nicoleandmaggie.wordpress.com/2010/10/15/birthday-presents/
For my birthday this year, we took a 2-hour hike at a local state park. We also had a seafood dinner at a fancy restaurant that night, but the hike was actually more enjoyable than the dinner, and it was free!
We have four birthdays in 3.5 weeks so I look for gifts/ideas all year long. Our girls have a family party at home with a reusable birthday hat and “happy birthday” banner. They also get to pick the homemade cake and ice cream flavors of their choice. We tend to only give one or two gifts per kid and a book so that helps a lot.
My husband gets the fancy cake he loves that takes three hours to make and steak fajitas. This year I took him on a whale watch (thanks to Groupon) and the kids hung out with grandparents. He had been talking about wanting to do that for years and we really like experience gifts.
We don’t have kids, so its not such a big deal in our house. But we don’t bother with presents just “because its a birthday”. We tend to just buy something if we think the other person will like it, at any time of the year (but only if it is a super-frugal deal obviously!). Then on the actual day the birthday person gets their favourite dinner cooked for them.
My kids LOVE scavenger hunts. We do them in our house and yard. Clues can be visual or written in riddle style. How about tickets for the family to see a pro soccer game as the final hidden prize? (I know, it’s not necessarily frugal per se, but I think spending on an experience is worth it. And there are often family pack deals.)
p.s. Your husband doesn’t read your blog??
Not usually.
Katy
We do birthday WEEK—every day of your birthday week, you get to select the dinner meal, the movie we watch (we don’t have TV) or the activity we do (all free type activities) each night of that week, and an hour long foot massage or an hour long back scratch each night (I always want the massage and my husabnd always wants the back scratch). On the last day of the week, which is the acutal birthday, we have home made ice cream. When we had kids, instead of a back scratch/foot rub, you had no daily chore that week.
I have two ideas: a surprise “Afternoon Delight” with a picnic at a place other than home, OR the thing you absolutely hate to do that he loves to do. Like watch wrestling, or go to Cabela’s. Now you have three years to plan for his 50th. Ann
One of the best and most appreciated traditions we began years ago with our ever growing family (5 kids, 3 sons-in-law and 1 grandson) is whenever we celebrate a birthday, we go around and everyone gets the chance to say something that they truly appreciate about the birthday person. I can tell you that this has brought our family closer together and everyone looks forward to this special time of honoring the birthday person. The gift of a heartfelt compliment and show of appreciation are the gifts that really count and are certainly the ones our family most appreciates and remembers–and they are free!
Is he a coffee guy? Many coffee joints offer free fancy coffee drinks on birthdays (at least there is a local chain of kiosks here that does). My husband is NOT a coffee guy, but I love coffee, and on *my* last birthday when we both had the day off (I was in nursing school and he was..?!) we made the rounds. I had several spiffy drinks I would never ordinarily spring for, drunk on the go in various parks. A fun, frugal & energizing day, to say the least.
I’m thinking “Afternoon Delight” but in the sexy sense! Why don’t you get a hotel room during the day somewhere nice, light some candles,get out the champagne, throw some rose petals around the room and be romantic!!! I don’t know about you, but what my husband and I miss most about having so many kids now is that we don’t have as much alone time together. And then you can take a nap and watch a movie or read together in bed or even blow off the mandatory school meeting ha ha. Pure bliss. 🙂
My husband makes me special play lists for my birthday and Valentine’s day. A lot of times it’s Music we already own, plus a few new things off iTunes for about a buck each. I often listen to them for months, or even years. It can be very personal and romantic depending on the songs selected. It’s my favorite frugal gift. On his birthday I often buy him artisan beers he’s never tried and I bake him hommemade cupcakes (both things he really loves).
Now if only we could reel it in a bit more for our kids’ birthdays…
My birthday falls at the end of may so my family would always buy me seedlings for my garden. Tomatoes, squash, zucchini, beans, pumpkins, lettuce, cukes, eggplant, corn and more. It kept me busy all summer and fed for longer. 🙂
On a birthday, I make a nice meal as requested by the birthday girl or boy. Then I make a homemade cake of their choice. If they are 18 or under I have a birthday party for our family (their cousins, aunt, uncles and grandparents…whoever can make it) on the weekend after or before their birthday. I usually do all the food for the party. Normally not something expensive.
In November and December we have 10 birthdays, including 3 either they day before or after Christmas, and in Feb we have 9.
See what’s on Groupon or Goldstar–last year, I got cheap tickets to Hall & Oates. Ironic! Fun!
I meant last year for my husband’s birthday. 🙂
In september we have 4 birthdays on the first with another on the 4th, then in feb. we have seven birthdays the week of valentines- none acually on valentines. Those are just the clustered ones, my daughters are exactly one week apart which insn’t such a big deal now but I’m sure will be when they get older.
I make a no holds bar dinner! I am a non-working chef and my family is allowed to choose whatever they want for dinner. It is very special for them and is still cheaper than dining out!
I like Alice’s suggestions. We generally do something along those lines. My husband enjoys a surprise as long as I tell him the parameters – what to wear, how long we’ll be in the car, etc. Last year I took him to a vineyard/winery for an outdoor barn tasting and gourmet pizza. The drive was gorgeous and it was a great day. One of his favorites was when I told him I was taking him out to dinner at the rotating restaurant on top of a classic hotel and when we walked in the restaurant he said, “Look! There’s Jimmy Green! As if our friend just happened to be there. He soon realized it was a large table of about 15 friends and he changed seats all night to visit with everyone. As we were leaving, I pressed another floor in the hotel because I had gotten a room for us for the night. I had his bag packed and in the morning we had breakfast and a swim. This last birthday I told him to plan something I would like and we basically did things we do all the time, but all in one day. So we went out for breakfast and then we had a picnic on the grounds of the Huntington museum, and then we went out for a glass of wine at our local winery and had food brought in, with friends joining us there and then coming back home with them for birthday pie which he had bought fresh that morning from the fancy local bakery. It was a perfect day.
I’d say the main thing is to make it special with no ordinary stuff – laundry, blogging, etc. – and focus it all on him.
Or you could just ask him what he’d like to do. 🙂
That is great, your husband is one lucky man!
Katy
If we want to go out for dinner, we try to pick a restaurant where you can get a free meal on your b’day.
In my extended family we have a lot of clumpage in April (10, 12, 14, 16), May (12, 14, 17, 19), & September (3 on the 19th & 1 on the 20th).
Also 3 on May 2nd.
We are lucky around these parts, our 5 family members each get their own birthday month (although my middle child’s birthday is Christmas Eve, so that’s a challenge).
We have a few birthday traditions – we always make the Pioneer Woman’s chocolate sheet cake (decorated specially for the birthday child), and my husband gets his annual Chocolate Guinness Cake.
I made fabric birthday pennants to hang up that are re-used for each birthday, and we have a silly birthday cake hat, and the kids always get a bunch of balloons, adults get flowers.
We make whatever the birthday boy/girl wants for dinner, and do an activity together as a family.
We just started a new tradition this year that instead of gifts each person gets $100 to spend how they choose. We’re all pretty picky in what we want, so that way we know we’ll love whatever we end up with, and it ends up being a fun event to have a splurge day.
Ill give ya a clump! May 8 son’s birthday. May 13 my birthday. Insert Mother’s Day. May 14 our anniversary. Blech. This year was horrible as only my son and I were home. I had a fancy pool party for his 11th, and his terrible behavior on my double day wrecked it. Have to wait another year :(. Hubby and I will go out for dinner to a local pub to mark our anniversary, a week late. Okay, done whining! Oh, and that’s only the ones in our house! Don’t get me started on May in my extended family!!
One year I gave my (then) husband the most magical gift from eBay and it was truly a MasterCard moment…priceless.
His favorite childhood stuffed toy was a McDonalds Hamburgler “doll.” There were many fond memories about that toy (juxtaposed around a broken family situation). I found a vintage c 1977 (the likely kind he had) on eBay and with shipping it was $20.
When he opened it, he just melted and was (uncharacteristically) speachless. He quickly found his words calling his siblings and father to tell them of the extraordinary gift. From that day forward, it’s home was on his nightstand and was used to “hold his glasses” each night.
When we separated, on his first night in his new place, he took the Hambugler and very little else until later in the weekend. I guess it was more meaningful then I ever imagined. I hope the story helps generate some interesting ideas.
One year we had *no* money and I really wanted to do something nice for my husband. I think he was turning 43. I made him a card on the computer – I think I used Microsoft Word… really basic. BUT… I wrote 43 things that I love about him. Some were funny/silly, some were really serious. Five years later… he still uses this card as his bookmark. I think it really choked him up.
Favorite meal is always a hit. Homemade cake or other favorite dessert is a classic. You can turn almost anything into a “cake.” One year I made a pyramid of rice krispie treats and topped it with plastic army men and toothpick flags. Maybe you could make ginger snaps and top with Star Wars figures?
We typically just go out for my husbands birthday to a place of my choosing and it’s usually a surprise. I wouldn’t call this frugal. Frugal suggestions include:
1. Making person’s favorite meal/desert
2. Picnic?
3. Trip to the park with the family (we love doing this)
4. Day spent doing what birthday person’s favorite things (i.e. fishing, hiking, window shopping at places you normally wouldn’t shop together).
Not necessarily frugal – but after 58 years of marriage, birthdays are a challenge! This year I found an old record of a song we liked in high school and had it put on a CD. Truly a surprise, and a success!
This is not a family tradition of mine, but I find this Angry Birds playable cake a very inspiring family-oriented birthday activity.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-hwVRzaQNkA
I think the joint b-day party is great…now that I’ve been to so many kid b-day parties as a new parent…I’d be happy to go to a joint one rather than 2 separate ones! My son’s one year old b-day is coming up…I have friends who went all out, but we’re having it at a park. We’d have it at our apartment, but it’s way too small.