Like most people, I travel in varied circles. Family, co-workers, neighbors, friends, fellow bloggers and society at large. And with the exception of a few, I am vastly different from most. I spend more, I spend less. I possess more, I possess less. Heavier/lighter, older/younger, louder/quieter. It never ends.
It can be hard to be content with who we are, when we are constantly comparing ourselves to others.
But is this a bad thing? We can’t shut ourselves away from society in order to exist without comparison, and I’m certainly not suggesting that we do. It’s when we negatively view ourselves to others that it becomes a problem.
I find motivation to declutter when I hang out with Tammy Strobel, I want to laugh more when I talk to my friend Jennifer, to be more present with my kids when I hang out with my co-worker Sasha and I strive to up my writing game when I correspond with J.D. Roth. None of this comparison is because I view myself as inferior to others, but because I see how others are living their lives and it inspires me.
Sometimes, this inspiration can be hard to find. We are surrounded by people who criticize our life choices, goals and values. But it’s important to know that we have choices about how we live our lives. If you find that someone is consistently making you feel bad about yourself, it’s important to ask yourself why. Move that person into a peripheral role or decide to just let that criticism roll off your back.
We all live different lives, which is how it should be. How freaking boring would society be if we all followed the same route?
So please, continue to compare yourself to others, but only as a means to affirm how fantastic you are and can truly be.
Katy Wolk-Stanley
“Use it up, wear it out make it do or do without”
{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }
Great reminder, Katy! We’re pretty blessed to have so many out-of-the-box thinkers so close to home, too! The rain must make us more thoughtful. LOL
Excellent point. I feel this way when I read other bloggers. I have to pull myself back from wishing to be more like them. I don’t need to be just like them. I have my own voice. And can enjoy theirs too.
This is so timely for me. In fact, I’m crying right now. My mothering style ws criticized in front of several of my peers…right to my face. It was difficult and disheartening and I’m trying to be the bigger person here. Just because I do things differently doesn’t mean I’m wrong. I’m trying to just let if roll off my back….there’s enough drama in the world. I don’t need hers!
Yes! I find lots of inspiration from people on the internet who are different than me.
Excellent post. I was reading something about only those that are truly comfortable with who they are gain strength and motivation from those around them. Thank you for being one of them.
Wow, Katy, I am so glad you wrote this post. I am always telling my husband, “Why can’t I find more people like myself. Where are they?”. I am usually the outcast in my various circles ~ I’m vegetarian, I choose to live in a smaller house, I don’t buy the latest technology until I am desperate for it, I don’t shop much at all, I often shop consignment, I don’t watch TV, I garden a lot, I spend a lot of time with my animals, I am overprotective of my daughter (as far as what she eats, what she reads, watches on TV, etc.), I read A LOT. I am extremely proud of all of these choices but I do wish I knew more people who made similar choices. This is one reason I love your blog. It’s nice to know there are others like me out there, even if they happen to be far away. And it’s nice to know I’m not the only one who feels this way from time to time….. So thanks for this awesome post! It was inspiring to me….
As someone who always compares myself to others, I’ll think about what you’ve written Katy. Even though I don’t think you and I are very alike, I think we share many of the same values. I’m certainly inspired by many of the thoughts and ideas expressed in your blog (one example: I think of you when I add vinegar to soften my wash).
Fabulous post! Diversity totally makes the world go round!
This post was exactly what I needed to hear at this time in my life. Thanks so much for sharing.
LOVE LOVE LOVE the new blog header!