Nordstrom is Selling $95 “Clear Knee Mom Jeans” and The Internet is Losing its Mind!

by Katy on March 16, 2017 · 26 comments

This blog post first appeared over at

You’re a fan of Clark Howard, which means that you’re thoughtful and deliberate with your spending. In short, you’re “Clark Smart.” You think twice before spending your hard earned money, and when your social media feed suddenly fills up with people posting about how Nordstrom is selling a pair of $95 TopShop “Clear Knee Mom Jeans,” you think “that must be a joke!”

But they’re no joke.

Here’s the description: “Slick plastic panels bare your knees for a futuristic feel in tapered and cropped high-waist jeans.” Yes, you read that right. The future now includes plastic encased knees, plus a high waist to create the perfect “mom jeans” aesthetic.

Of course, the internet exploded with incredulous responses. Buzzfeed, quickly termed them “jindows,” (jeans + windows) and reported that they were “dividing the nation.” And Buffy The Vampire Slayer’s Tommy Lenk, (famous for recreating celebrity looks from household detritus) added this photo to his Instagram feed. and shared that his “knees were dripping with sweat after two minutes.”

Those of us old enough to remember the 1981 Ryan O’Neal film So Fine recognize the look. Of course, that film is described as a “satirical romp,” and should in no way be inspiring any real life fashion trends.

Perhaps the look is prompted by people complaining of shiveringly wet knees after wearing TopShops’s “Hayden Ripped Boyfriend Jeans.” After all, they’re a British fashion house, and what is England known for besides rain?

Look, brr . . .

Luckily, you’re too smart to be tempted by this bizarre (and hopefully brief) style trend. You follow Will Roger’s famous quote that “The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it in your back pocket”

That is, if your jeans still include a back pocket.

Katy Wolk-Stanley

“Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without.”

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{ 26 comments… read them below or add one }

mel March 16, 2017 at 10:46 pm

ROLF!!!! Feeling pretty incredulous… double checked it’s StPatricks Day, not April Fools!


mel March 16, 2017 at 10:48 pm

ROFL…. see – I’ve really lost it over this! 😉


Yvette down under March 16, 2017 at 11:05 pm

Maybe they are just for people with cute knees?? In winter my ” mohair stockings” would be seen and shame me into shaving my legs !!


susan March 16, 2017 at 11:46 pm

Just when you think you have seen the stupidest thing ever, along comes something even stupider… I sure hope this “fashion trend” does not catch on.
Thanks for the chuckle, Katy! 😉


Mrs. Daisy @ Dirt Road Daisy March 17, 2017 at 4:30 am

I LOVE Tommy Lenk! His Instagram is so hilarious. I live in an extremely rural area and actually saw someone wearing pants like this! It was a shock because the normal attire for people in our town is their dirty farm clothes from working outside all day.


Jennifer March 17, 2017 at 4:47 am

Wow, just wow… another “thing” that is popular yet makes no sense and cost way too much. Like a bikini, how can they charge so much for so little fabric? These jeans are practically shorts with extra material. They have holes in the knees with a “patch” that doesn’t really cover anything but instead puts a spot light on it. Also, I don’t think most people have the best looking knees as a general rule. I have never heard the phrase, ” Oh, she has the sexiest knees”!?! And besides, everyone knows that the main reason to wear jeans is so you can skip shaving so these would ruin my plans. Ok, rant over.


Katy March 17, 2017 at 9:28 am

Not sure that they’re “popular,” vs. an item that’s currently for sale.


Jennifer March 17, 2017 at 4:53 pm

Oh ok, well, it does make me feel better that they aren’t necessarily flying off the racks.


Cindy in the South I March 17, 2017 at 4:48 am



nicoleandmaggie March 17, 2017 at 5:06 am

I miss grunge– I was able to wear my most comfy naturally ratty jeans all the time back then. Alas, now that I’m a grown-up, once there’s a hole in the jeans they have to be retired.


Vickey March 17, 2017 at 10:10 am

Futuristic in an “Idiocracy wasn’t supposed to be a prophecy” sort of way. 😛


Annye March 17, 2017 at 11:01 am

Thanks for the laugh, Vickey; you just brightened my drizzly-and-gray St. Paddy’s Day!

I too have been wondering how we ended up living in another Mike Judge movie. (I already did that once working for a big corporation, i.e. Office Space.)


Vickey March 17, 2017 at 1:14 pm

My pleasure! Humor is one of my favorite cheap thrills, and people on here are generous about sharing it.


Annie March 17, 2017 at 11:56 am

All I can think of the poor sap who buys and wears these is “Fashion Victim!” It’s bad enough paying for jeans with holes already in them, but this?…Bwhaaa, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha…you deserve to be laughed at.


Marianne March 17, 2017 at 12:23 pm

These might end up at Goodwill you could cut up to be used as rags…maybe someone clever can find a use for the plastic knees. :/


MommaL March 17, 2017 at 1:51 pm

Thanks for the laugh Katy!
When I was young I wore ripped jeans, but they were naturally ripped because they were old. This is too funny. Esp because I can’t stand the feel of plastic against my skin. Even my raincoats aren’t plastic.


kathleen March 17, 2017 at 3:38 pm

I’m picturing someone wearing these eating a Cheeto shaped like Harambe.


Katy March 17, 2017 at 6:05 pm

Wow! Thanks for the great laugh…I am folding my money and putting it back in my pocket for sure!! I have probably spent way too much time thinking about those jeans with windows, but how do you even wash them? Windex?!


Vickie March 19, 2017 at 10:24 am

Hahahahaha!!!! Windex! That’s awesome. ROFL!!


Kathleen March 17, 2017 at 8:16 pm

This is hilarious. Just today I ended up following several school buses and I would say that over 90 percent of the middle schoolers/high schoolers got off the buses with fake ripped jeans. Some were so ripped I was sure that they should have been sent home to change. I was sitting in my SUV thinking how much I hate this fake ripped jeans fashion trend and now this. I wear jeans most of the time and I will not, nor have I ever worn fake ripped jeans. This look as well as the tassels and pom poms added to everything needs to go. It makes people look like they robbed the trim off the living room drapes. Just awful.


Bee March 17, 2017 at 11:29 pm

Not my style for certain! However, this is a style trend straight from the city streets. It has been highjackedI!!! The street version is missing the lovely plastic at the knee. As a young person, I may have worn something as silly such as an oversized cut up sweatshirt (Flash Dance), skinny ankle jeans with zippers and pink leg warmers.


Shevaun March 18, 2017 at 4:01 pm

Okay, just for the sake of argument…

My toddler is currently in love with Terry Fox (a Canadian hero: ran like a bajillion miles with a prosthetic leg). So now she points to her own legs: she has one “robot leg” and one “my leg”. (btw, my tot does not have a prosthetic, she is playing pretend and is curious about different bodies)

So maybe the plastic windows would show off our super awesome robot legs?

I’m just really, *really* trying to have an open mind here.


Adriana @MoneyJourney March 18, 2017 at 11:57 pm

I wouldn’t spend $95 on a pair of ‘normal’ jeans, let alone a pair with plastic panels!

Sense of fashion is odd though. I do understand people having different taste when it comes to clothes, I have many friends who own plenty of ripped jeans (and paid quite a price for each pair).

However, this might be taking things a bit too far 😀


Vickie March 19, 2017 at 10:21 am

I can’t believe people actually pay money for destroyed clothing, but KUDOS to the designer for coming up with this stuff and making money for being smart enough to market it.
My cousin used to work at a Levis plant here in Oklahoma and she laughed so hard telling us about how the hunters that worked for them used to have fun creating “shotgun denims”. The literally hung the pants on a clothesline in back of the plant and let their employees shoot them with a shotgun. I think they were $50 a pair and became a humorous point in history. No one could believe people were ignorant enough to pay for a pair of “shot-up pants”. Hahahahaha!!!


K D March 19, 2017 at 11:35 am

Thanks for keeping us up to date on yet another item we can happily live without. The desperation level to sell us yet another item floors me.

Keep up the good work (blog).


Karen March 20, 2017 at 7:36 am

Wow. My husband’s work jeans look like that (sans plastic) after a few weeks. Maybe I should glue plastic inside them and sell them on Ebay for three times what we paid. Do you think the ground in dirt will lend an air of authenticity? They say one is born every minute….


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